9 of Swords, reversed

Oof, this is a tough one. 9 of Swords. It’s about regret, shame, pain, dread … those dreary, weighted things which keep you up at night.

No one is immune. We’ve all had our dark night of the soul, that time when there just don’t seem to be any good options. Everything is painted in shades of grey and black. Everything you do and think brings you back to that same place: stuck, hopeless, overwhelmed.

When a card is reversed, it often suggests that its focus is internal. So, with the 9 of Swords, it’s likely not an external situation which is provoking these feelings. There may indeed be a negative external event, but the misery? You’re doing it to yourself.

So yes, there’s a negative experience out there – your dear one is sick, you’re unemployed, you’re  estranged from your closest friend – but we so often magnify the pain with our thoughts. Around and around they loop, the negative thoughts. “I’m too passive.” “I have no marketable skills.” “She’ll never forgive me.” “I hate to see her suffer so.” “I’m pathetic!”

We rehearse those helpless, hopeless, negative thoughts. They whirl in our head, our busy brain refusing our exhausted body the rest it craves.

But, you know, if 90% of our pain is created/magnified/maintained by our thoughts … and I can’t say for sure about you, but I know that figure’s about right for me! If that’s true, surely we have some control here?

Surely we have other options than to just passively watch the horror film in our head? Could we not … get up, turn on the light, change the channel?

Yes. We can. We have a choice. We can replace “I’m too passive,” with “What one small thing I can do, right now?” Instead of “I have no marketable skills,” ask a friend what they see in you. Make a list. Consider your negative thoughts, and rebut them. Come up with a counter to them.

The next time a negative thought intrudes, replace it with the new, positive one. At first the new ones will feel fake and weak. They won’t be convincing. This has certainly been true for me … after all, I’d been practicing some of those negative thoughts for years! Don’t worry! With practice, the positive thoughts will get stronger, they’ll feel more real.  Give your new thoughts a change to catch up.

Your dark night of the soul could turn out to be a pivot point in your life, turning you from helplessness to action, from hopelessness to confidence. If the true source of your pain is in the words you say to yourself, change the script!

You can do it.