Aspirations + Resolutions
All those of you who made resolutions: have you already broken them? All of them? Some? I’m betting a lot of you have.
New Year’s Resolutions. Last week we considered approaching the new year with the attitude of the Fool rather than the Hierophant. We considered being open-hearted explorers of our lives, instead of trying to make them fit a predetermined mould.
This week, we’re going to re-frame the idea of resolutions yet again. We’re not going to toss them entirely. Resolutions can serve a useful purpose. They only become a problem when we start and end with them. Resolutions are useful tools, but they’re the tools, not the craftsman. Tools can create amazing things, in the hands of a skilled craftsman. So, if resolutions are the tools, what is the craftsman?
Aspirations.
Aspirations. There’s a lovely concept. So full of hope, potential, possibility. Aspirations fall solidly within the realm of Fire, one of the four elements of the Tarot, and the element we’re concerned with for the next two and a half months. The element of Fire is all about passions, ambitions, enthusiasms, aspirations.
Aspirations are more flexible than resolutions. A resolution has a bottom line — Did you get to the gym three times a week? Did you lose those ten pounds? Did you finish that big project? If you resolve to do a thing, you can tick it off a list when complete … or feel like a failure if you don’t reach that bottom line, and the box remains unticked.
Aspirations, though… When you aspire to something, you’re beginning a process, and so long as you’re at some point on that process, you’re succeeding.
Aspirations are often quite big, and will need smaller steps to get you there. Those smaller steps are what we’d typically call resolutions.
So. This year I aspire to grow compassion in myself. “Become more compassionate.” It’s a Big Goal. (I could write a long and involved post about why I chose it, but for now I’ll just say that it’s a response to some deep, very old wounds that impact me negatively to this day. I believe it will be extraordinarily healing, emotionally and spiritually, and could improve my overall quality of life in a very significant way.)
It’s a Big Goal. It’s a very meaningful one, for me. It’s also very nebulous. It’s a great thing to aspire to, but how will I achieve it? How will I even know if I’m doing it? I need some tangible steps, things that could, if I wanted, be ticked off a list.
I’ve come up with a few:
- Daily use of affirmations
- Meditation (already a daily practice for me, so just changing the focus to include my new aspiration)
- Self-compassion at times of strong negative emotions
- Time of compassionate reflection, in the evenings, on the events of the day
- Responding to negative emotions (evoked by others) with compassion for the other person
I’m sure more will emerge over the year.
If I’d made a resolution, “Five minutes of affirmations every day”, and I forget a day – or a week! – I’ve failed. That resolution has been “broken”. But if those daily affirmations are a step to something I aspire to, I haven’t lost that aspiration just because I lost my pace for a bit. If you pull over at a rest stop on the highway, have you ended your journey? If you get off track because of a detour, is the journey over?
The passion of an aspiration will keep you coming back, over and over again. Have I always remembered to take that time of reflection each day? Nope, and we’re only 10 days into the year! Have I failed, then? Is my aspiration ‘broken’? Of course not! I am building something here. It will take time. I haven’t lost the aspiration, and I certainly haven’t broken it. The process is ongoing.
How about you? What do you passionately aspire to? Not what you “should” do (more on that next week), but what lights you up inside? Where are you the happiest? Do more of that! What drags you down? Do less of that!
Align yourself with your passions, and you will be a fulfilled and happy human.
What are your passions? What lights you up? What brings you joy? What can you aspire to this year?
