,

Temperance for Christmas

It’s December!! On your marks, get set … HOLIDAY!!!

Aren’t you just so excited?

More likely, you’re feeling tired before you start. Your month is a to-do list to rival Santa’s “Good kids” list. And it’s topped by a day that has you up before dawn, and working, full-throttle, until bedtime.

Not everyone does this, but a lot of us do. It’s a societal expectation, really. “Busy” is a virtue in our time and place. “Crazy-busy” is a badge of honour. We don’t give the seasonal mayhem much thought, not really. Sure, we’ll complain about it, but that’s kind of a community-building activity amongst the beleaguered, isn’t it? We swap horror stores and to-do lists, roll our eyes at the impossibility of finding that impossible gift for the impossible person on our shopping lists.

It’s kind of satisfying, this camaraderie of the over-burdened. But … surely there’s a better way?

If you could choose, how would you like to feel about this season?

Note, I haven’t asked what would you like to do this season. We can all come up with a list three times as long as there’s any hope of achieving. So, never mind the ‘doing’ for now.

How do you want to feel throughout this month? How do you want to feel at the end of it?

I’m betting you don’t want to feel frantic, stressed, anxious, resentful, worn thin, over-burdened, under-appreciated. I’m thinking your lists might include words like thankful, peaceful, happy, love, satisfied, restful, community, grateful, content.

Doesn’t that second list sound so much better? So here’s the real question: Is there any way to get here (mayhem and stress) to there (peace and satisfaction)?

Yes. By taking on the energy and priorities of this month’s card.

Temperance. Temperance is about moderation. Balance. Harmony. Things working together. A little of this, a little of that, not too much of any one thing. Mixing up the perfectly balanced cocktail that soothes and feeds your psyche.

Temperance is not the Hermit. It doesn’t demand that you turn your back on the festivities and go live in a cave. But neither is it the three of Cups, one giant ol’ party from dawn to dusk, nor the 8 of Pentacles, one long, never-ending grind.

Temperance asks us, “What brings you peace and satisfaction?”

Temperance suggests that we look through our miles-long to-do list with a discerning eye, and circle those that really, really, bring us joy and satisfaction. Those things, we keep.

The rest? Well, that’s up to you. Do you discard them altogether? Do you delegate them?  Do you do some less-intensive version? You decide!

What Temperance strongly suggests is that you stop trying to do it all. There is no virtue in wearing yourself down to a tiny nubbin of exhaustion and resentment.

Where is the joy for you, this month?

I looked at my list. I’ve decided I’m going to keep the Christmas baking. I actively enjoy that, particularly when I do it with my grand-daughter. It’s a special time, making a sugary mess in my kitchen with that little bundle of sweetness.

I’m going to give up the handmade advent calendar, though. I’ve made some beauts in my time, and taken a great deal of joy in creating them, but this year, it feels not enough like the joy of creativity, and too much like stress. So this year my advent calendar was purchased, completely guilt-free.

I love playing the piano, but haven’t, really, for years. I also love Christmas music, so I’m making time to crack my rusty knuckles and start playing Christmas music. Not because I ‘should’, but because I want to, and it’s bringing me joy and satisfaction.

This year, I have completely stepped out of the planning of the festivities, leaving it entirely in the hands of my (adult) children. All I’ll have to do is show up. (Woot!)

How about you? What can you do to lighten the burden of this season, and increase its joy, for you?